Stealth is often admirable. Patti Smith once was quoted as In art and dream may you proceed with abandon. In life may you proceed with balance and stealth. A new behavioral trend called Stealthing redefines and corrupts the more common meaning of stealth.
The design and use of condoms originated around 13,000 years ago. Over the last two centuries, the condom use during sex has helped control sexually transmitted diseases (STD) and reduced unwanted pregnancies. A new trend emerges from a generation after the dark decade of AIDS is something called stealthing, when a man secretly removes a condom in the middle of sex. This trend seems to cover both straight and gay sexual relationships. It is a new form of rape as a non-consensual act might integrate into a consensual act in a relationship.
Does stealthing involve loving or close sexual relationships? Not at all. The term “stealthing” has the obvious benefit of rolling off the tongue faster than “non-consensual” removal of a condom during a sex act. This act can allow transmission of an STD or lead to an unwanted pregnancy. Non-consensual sex is equivalent to “No” and should be defined as rape. But, in the USA, this emerging trend among teens and young adults is very difficult to prosecute. In Florida, Tampa Defense Attorney Hunter Chamberlain indicated that prosecuting for stealthing in the U.S. is difficult. Among litigating legality is that there are very few stealthing cases brought to court.
Courts are just beginning to view Rape cases as being non-consensual. Is stealthing rape? In our puritan perspective, if both partners consent to perform a sex act together, it is no longer viewed as rape. Stealthing is more defined as a secretive part of the sex act NOT SHARED WITH OTHER PARTNER. It might be viewed as an assault – after the fact. Better protection under the law is required to legally prosecute those who practice stealthing.
Stealthing isn’t merely a woman’s dilemma. It appears as a trend among gay men. While there are no risk of unwanted pregnancies, young gay men may not recall the serious AIDS epidemic that infectiously killed several hundred thousands gay men in the 1980’s or 1990’s. AIDS proved to be far more deadly to the gay community than standard sexually transmitted diseases (STD).
Removing the condom during sex, stealthing increases the risks of pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. Affected sexual partners are turned into victims and may experience emotional and psychological distress, especially those who have experienced sexual violence in the past.
Stealthing as a rising trend is gross irresponsibility gone wild. So before you give your consent for a sexual tryst, consider stealthing and the trust you have with your consensual partner.
In global environments where polyamory and LGBTQ coexist, consent and trust must be mutual. Otherwise I’d suggest restraining the male using the condom during sex. Though somewhat kinky, it poses fewer dangers than the possibilities of what stealthing delivers. Like rape, stealthing should be a punishable offense.
Stealthing is an unfriendly practice among lovers and friends.